I am writing to my younger self, to you as my friends and even to myself....with that in mind going forward I will begin each post with:
I want you to know that You are important. No matter what you've gone through in the past, you are here right now and you are beautiful. You have already overcome so much more than you realize. You are already becoming such an amazing person. You matter. This is so important to be reminded of every day of your life. The dreams that you have, the desires in your heart, the hopes for your future- they matter. You matter.
Don’t be afraid to hope for big things, dream up an amazing life, desire good things for yourself. You are worth it. You matter. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need, seek after what makes you happy, and strive to be what you want to be. You are important.
This is a really hard thing to truly grasp, especially as a mom. I think we are so used to putting everyone else’s needs in front of ours that sometimes our own needs get lost. We don’t even realize we have our own wants anymore. We forget that part of being a great mom is being a whole person and that means working on yourself too. Well, this is something I am working on daily right now.
I am reminding myself, a lot lately, of my own worth and that I am not a finished product. I am not who I was 20 years ago. That is good. I have grown so much. I am growing and changing every day and constantly trying to come to a closer understanding of who I am and who I want to be. I am learning to ask for what I need and let others help me.
Being sick is a time that I’ve had to really let other people help me. For some reason it is way easier for me to say no, I’m fine, thank you anyway. This week though, I was thinking about all of this and I said yes, and I am so glad I did. This gave me a chance to see how loved and valued I am.
I am so grateful for the people in my life that love me in a way that makes me love myself even more. I love helping people and doing kind things for them, so why is it so hard to let others do that for me? I am learning how to do this more and more and not feel bad or like I’m making them go out of their way for me when I don’t feel worthy. But I am worth it. Everyone has times when they need more than they can give. In those times we need to let others help us, for their sake and for ours.
Every day for the last couple of weeks, I’ve been saying to myself in the mirror, every morning, my mantra from my 30 day challenge. I've been saying, “I am Strong. I am Confident. I am Brave.” And you know what? It's working. That mantra pops into my head at other times of the day when I need that reminder. I am believing in myself more, and feeling stronger, more confident, and brave.
I am recognizing those characteristics in myself throughout my days. I am proud of myself for taking time to work on myself in this busy time of my life. I am not feeling guilty for wanting things for myself, but feeling empowered because of it. It is helping me see my worth and my value in this life. It is beautiful.
I am already thinking about what I will do next to challenge myself when the 30 days are over. I want to feel good about myself and I want to continue to believe in myself a little more every day.
I hope you will continue to join me on this journey. Please comment on this blog page or send me a message on the MamaBear Facebook page to let me know how your 30 day challenge is going and how I can encourage you.
Dear Young MamaBear,
Being you can be really hard. It can mean that a lot of hurtful things may come up from your past, when you start thinking about who you are and how you got to where you are today. It can mean that you will have to process a lot of what makes you who you are. You might discover some things about yourself that you don’t like. That can be a good thing if you let it be. It can be a good time to talk to someone safe-a spouse, a parent, a partner, a good friend, a professional counselor if it’s too much to even think about by yourself.
If even talking out loud to someone is too much to handle, then try journaling to start with. Writing to yourself. You can discover a lot about yourself just by writing down what you are really thinking. Process the things that you’ve been holding onto, deep in your being, way down in the corners of yourself where it can’t be found by anyone, until you decide it’s time.
Don't edit your thoughts, just write and let it flow. It doesn't have to start out extreme or intense. Just write what you're thinking and why and what you're feeling. Once you've started letting it flow then that should lead to deeper and more personal thoughts that will sometimes surprise you.
Processing with someone safe is a really important part of letting yourself be you. You can start to work through things, one at a time, so that you can realize that you are not just that person anymore. Every day you are changing, becoming a little more of who you want to be, and moving forward. If you are moving forward, toward who you want to be, then you aren’t stuck. You aren’t staying still or moving backwards, so you are already becoming who you want to be. Processing with someone safe will help you start to heal and grow even more.
I hope you will continue to join me on this journey!
Check out the Become a MamaBear section to find journal prompts.
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